TORRANCE, CA—Area mother Anna-Beth Sturgess was overwhelmed with joy today after receiving a $2.99 CVS Mother’s Day card from her son in exchange for a nine month pregnancy and 23 years of maternal care. “Thank you so much sweetie! This is such a thoughtful card,” said Sturgess, placing the card on the coffee table and letting out a nearly imperceptible defeated sigh. “I’m really looking forward to having the whole day to myself. That’s really the best gift I could have asked for.” At press time Sturgess was seen watching her seventh episode of Gilmore Girls alone in the living room.