WESTWOOD—Archaeologists this week discovered fossils believed to belong to a previously unknown species of dinosaur that likely looked stupid as hell based on what can be surmised from its remains. “We have yet to learn much about this prehistoric predator, but it is clear even just by examining its fossilized head that it definitely looked stupid as hell,” said UCLA paleoanthropology professor Dr. P. Jeffrey Brantingham, erupting in laughter as he gestured at the dinosaur’s exceptionally long chin, oversized teeth, and the distance between the slots where its eyes once were. “Pardon my lack of professionalism, but when you find the remnants of a creature that looked like such a ridiculous fucking idiot, you can’t help but understand why these things went extinct. I mean, look at it! I challenge you to find an extant species that looks anywhere near as dumb as this dinosaur. Hahahahaha.” Following the discovery of the fossils, scientists had decided to name the dinosaur tyrannosaurus imbecilis in honor of its unique appearance.