PALMS—Local man Matthew Cross proclaimed that he was excited for 2021 in a statement widely condemned as idiotic. “Thank god 2020 is over; 2021 is going to be my year,” Cross divulged during a Zoom call with friends, indulging such delusions as national unity and a break from global crises. “We made it through the worst year yet, and there is always light after the storm. I can’t wait to see what opportunities 2021 brings!” At press time, despite Cross’ misguided predictions, 2021 had so far brought a siege of the United States Capitol, the unprecedented second impeachment of a sitting president, record death tolls from COVID-19, and historic job losses.